Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Adventure 23

Stop the Spam You Dickheads - Use Orkut

This one's specifically dedicated to all those losers who decide to spam all their email contacts with shitty spam. Get hold of some nice jokes or celebrity pics if you will - I am game for that. Just stop inviting me to those new revolutionary concepts called friend networks. I don't give a damn about whether we like the same books or not. I don't give a damn as to whether you are currently reading The Monk who Sold his Ferrari or the latest offerings of pop philosophical trash gurus like Chetan Bhagat. I have absolutely no interest in sending free SMS to you, in exchange for a hundred SMS's sent by your free service to my cellphone. I don't give a shit about the Re.1 I could stand to earn for the every ten SMSs I read either. My mobile phone is strictly to receive corny, vulgar and politically incorrect forwards you morons. Yes, if I have joined such a network, its purely to stop the bloody spam and pass it forward.

Yes, occasionally I do give a shit about the wild rave parties you attended - especially if you are young, photogenic and female, or have friends who match that description. Please do post pictures of you with a pierced, tattooed belly holding a Bloody Mary on your Orkut album. I do check up on those regularly. If you are beautiful, female and photogenic or have friends who match that description, please feel free to post your/their photos on your orkut / facebook profiles. I am not however a total moron who spends a dollar on virtual gifts (handcuff, teddy bear, etc). Yes, I have occasionally felt like virtually winking at or spanking (using SuperPoke) a few young and photogenic females - unfortunately they are not my facebook friends' list. Get a life and join the India Network will you? Facebook sucks ass - bigtime. Where are the good old days when people would post snaps of their office picnics and rave parties on Orkut? I also respectfully show the middle fingers to all you losers who post pics of scenery, cartoons, babies etc as your profile pic. And if you are using networks like Facebook - get a brain and use Orkut, MORON!


Anonymous said...

"Hello soump,

A request for friendship with you has been made by pmnitk.

You can accept or decline the friendship request on your Shelfari homepage"


Unknown said...


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